How to give yourself the best chance with the person you are dating.
1. Be comfortable in your own skin.
To be your most attractive self, you must strive to look your best. It’s not about getting in shape and looking good just to date, it’s about cultivating a healthy lifestyle with healthy habits and attitudes for the rest of your life. It’s about excellent self-care.
If you feel good physically, you radiate attractive energy.
2. Feel good in your soul.
People who love themselves radiate a very positive energy that attracts everyone they meet. People who don’t like themselves emit a negative energy that is unattractive and turns others off. If you’re struggling with your confidence, you’ll feel better when you date someone who likes you, but ultimately, being desired by someone else won’t fix your broken self-esteem.
If you’re struggling with your self-esteem, take the responsibility to work on it now. If you want to be your best dating self, build your self-esteem and learn to love yourself.
3. Be a growing person.
Nothing is more attractive than a person who knows themselves and is working to become a better version of themselves. Spend less time on networking and dating apps and more time working to be the best version of yourself. A growing person is an attractive person.
In practice, this can mean working to clarify your values, priorities and life goals, refining your character, e.g. B. Working on being a kinder and more generous person, becoming more patient, having more gratitude. So if you want to be your best dating self, become a deeper, self-expanding person.
4. Be yourself.
A woman recently told me that she has a sharp mind and works to tone it down on dates. I suggested she let it rip!
When you’re married you have to be yourself, so why hide who you are when you’re dating? Let your date see the real you and let him or her decide if they like what they see.
A corollary to this principle is: Do not play games such as B. Hard to get, calculating days between texts, etc. You’re out of high school. If you like someone, tell them. Be honest. Be transparent. be direct be grown up If you want to be your best dating self, show your true colors.
5. Discover what is special about this person and share it.
Imagine you are a reporter who has to write an article about what makes this person special. Notice what is beautiful and virtuous about this person.
We are experts at finding the faults and weaknesses of others and pride ourselves on being so insightful. Big whip. Finding mistakes does not require deep insight. Seeing what is good in others and taking pleasure in them does.
Practice this on your next date. And if you spot something beautiful, don’t be afraid to share your observations. People love to be seen and understood. If you want to be your best dating self, focus on figuring out what’s great about that person.
6. Be a great listener.
Listening is rare. How many people in your life really listen to you?
Listening conveys the message, “I respect your perspective and, more importantly, your feelings.” When we listen, we empower and encourage others. When we don’t listen, we turn people off and discourage them.
People who listen are loved by those who share. Listening is certainly a powerful way to be your best dating self.