Gay rugby player on how the sport helped her find herself

There’s a stereotype that sport isn’t a welcoming place for LGBTQ+ people — but that’s not Jade Konkel-Roberts’ experience.

Jade is a professional rugby player on the Harlequins women’s team. She grew up in a “rather rugby-oriented” family in Scotland, where both her brothers and parents played rugby.

“Every Saturday when I was a toddler we would watch my dad play rugby and I remember it was my favorite thing to do on a Saturday,” she says. “All the rugby boys made you feel like part of the family and you just have to run up and down the pitch wildly, really.”

On one occasion, Jade was a little over-zealous in her commitment to rugby when she jumped onto the pitch to help her father tackle one-on-one.

“He had to pick me up in the middle of a fight, and then I supposedly turned to him and said, ‘Dad, why did you hurt me?’ Because he didn’t let me in. He was obviously trying to protect me from all these massive men running at me,” she laughs.

When she was nine, Jade played a year in a mini-league where she was mixed with the boys – but eventually stopped playing rugby because there was no girls’ team. She reignited her love of sport at the age of 17 when she joined the Scotland U20 women’s team.

“I was like, oh right, cool, I think rugby is it,” she laughs.

Shortly thereafter, she moved to Glasgow, where she was able to explore her identity more fully for the first time. Joining a rugby club helped with that.

“When I was 18 and actually moved to Glasgow I thought well it’s probably going to be a lot easier to come out and be myself because I’m on a rugby team and it’s just normal. No one would really bat an eyelid either way, really. For me it was a really easy environment to get out of.”

Jade is well aware that things aren’t quite as inviting across the board. While women’s rugby has provided her with a comfortable space to embrace her sexuality, others are not so lucky.

This appears to be particularly true in men’s rugby and soccer, where openly queer players are still few.

“You just want the men’s side in particular to create an open environment where if you happen to be gay, you can be cool, open and gay,” says Jade.

“There is still a long way to go to normalize that in men’s sport, while in women you see it from the other side. It’s a fairly stereotypical – especially soccer and rugby – gay sport, so you’ll want to make sure everyone knows it’s open to all.

“You want to make sure that no matter what sporting environment you’re in, it doesn’t favor one side or the other. It just becomes normal that you can be whoever you want to be.”

Firefighting has made Jade Konkel-Roberts a better rugby player

When Jade isn’t on the rugby field, she’s spending her time putting out fires – literally – or with her new wife. She recently got married – an event she describes as “the best day ever” – and works as a firefighter in London.

“It’s like having a completely different rugby team, except you’re wearing PPE and breathing apparatus and going into burning buildings,” laughs Jade.

“I actually think that’s why I play better rugby because I can focus on that… I think it’s going to make my life in transition a lot smoother when I retire from rugby.”

Still, retirement isn’t on the cards for Jade just yet. In fact, she’s preparing for the Harlequins Game Changer match on May 13, which serves as a celebration of women’s rugby. She and her teammates will take on Wasps Women in a match dedicated to showing the importance of women’s sports.

“Events like this help show that [women’s rugby] is here – and hopefully people will come back week after week,” says Jade.

The Game Changer match takes place on Saturday, May 13th at 3pm at The Stoop. Tickets are available here.