Love is definitely in the air (and on the plan) as we can’t help but gush over the past week’s TV.
Abbott Elementary School returned on Wednesday with a Valentine’s Day-themed episode in which Janine (Quinta Brunson) found out she has secret admirers in her class and on her staff. In Gotham City, Harley Quinn (voiced by Kaley Cuoco) and Poison Ivy (voiced by Lake Bell) had their first Valentine’s Day. Sophie (Kim Cattrall) also gave her son some wise relationship advice in this week’s episode How I met your father.
Sometimes obsession gets confused with love, and who knows that better than self-proclaimed romantic (but actual stalker and serial killer) Joe Goldberg (Penn Badgley)? That’s right, You is back with Part 1 of Season 4 as Joe turns his love of literature into a career and gets caught up in a murder across the pond.
Read on to see some of our favorite lines of the week!
ABC
Abbott Elementary School (ABC)
“It happens every now and then. Students form a real bond with the teachers, which is understandable, but sometimes kids get confused and it becomes a little crush. Also, I look like a giant kid, so they’re even more confused.”
— Janine finds out on Valentine’s Day that one of her students has a crush on her.
CBS
The 65th Annual Grammy Awards (CBS)
“The sexiest man in the world. Are you kidding? No competition! Sex symbol of the world – especially now that they’ve done away with the green M&M.”
– Host Trevor Noah gushes about Harry Styles and jokes about a controversial decision by Mars.
HBO Max
Harley Quinn (HBO Max)
“We’ll have a quiet dinner for two at Mama Macaroni’s, where the breadstick basket, much like my love for you, is bottomless.”
— Harley Quinn sets out to give her friend Poison Ivy the best Valentine’s Day she’s ever had.
Hello
How I met your father (hulu)
“Son, when you’re young and you go out in New York, friend groups can get pretty incestuous.”
— Future Sophie describes to her son what dating can be like within the group of friends.
CBS
NCIS (CBS)
“Hey, are you sure you only need one take? Because I think I want to try something different.”
– Special agent Nick Torres (Wilmer Valderrama) gets the lead role as a dead body in a movie about NCIS REACT agents.
ABC
The bachelor (ABC)
“Lately, when I’ve dated someone or met them, I haven’t been able to be with them for more than a full day and not be like, ‘Oh, there it is. That’s the problem.’”
– Bachelor contestant Brooklyn Willie talks to the other girls about how she can quickly find the ick in the guys she’s dating.
ABC
Saturday night live (ABC)
“So, to all my family watching in Chile, I just want to say: te amo, te extraño, y deja de dar mi informacíon personal, which means I love you, I miss you, and stop giving my phone number to pass on.”
— Host Pedro Pascal jokes about his family’s reaction to his fame during his monologue.
ABC
night court (ABC)
“Smelling like sausages has its downside. Who doesn’t love having a bunch of dogs chasing them?”
— Abby Stone (Melissa Rauch) shows Bailiff Gurgs (Lacretta) at least one of the perks of living above a German beer hall.
Netflix
You (netflix)
“Crap. I’m in a detective story, the lowest form of literature.”
– Literary enthusiast and murderer Joe Goldberg, now Professor Jonathan Moore, has turned the tables by being implicated in a murder he did not commit.
ABC
Not dead yet (ABC)
Sam: “I wish I loved everything as much as Tina loves salads.”
Nele: “You have two children.”
— Sam (Hannah Simone) stares longingly at her colleague Tina as she prepares her salad, much to Nell’s (Gina Rodriguez) confusion.
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