Why Your Healthy Habits Don’t Stick (And How To Change It), According To A Behavioral Sustainability Scientist

If you look closely at the lives of the most successful people in the world, you’ll see that they all seem to have one thing in common – healthy habits.

Whether it’s Richard Branson’s commitment to getting up early to exercise first thing in the morning (something the Obamas also swear by), the daily meditation practice of Arianna Huffington and Oprah Winfrey, or the love of Bill Gates, Mark Cuban and Warren Buffett for reading , just to name a few.

While starting a new habit may be easy, maintaining it is a whole different enchilada. Although self-discipline and motivation play key roles in whether or not you’re able to stick to a healthy habit, it turns out that a flexible approach is just as important.

“The primary way society teaches you to adopt healthy habits is what drives most people to start and stop, but not persevere,” says Michelle Segar, behavioral sustainability scientist, award-winning researcher at the University of Michigan, and author of The joy choice.

“Much of the narrative about behavior change encourages doing it in a specific way and in a prescribed amount. This narrative has cultivated a strong belief in an all-or-nothing approach and grandiose schemes – both of which thwart sustainability for most,” explains Seegar.

Residents vs. non-residents

While “residents” might thrive with this conventional approach, since it encourages the kind of structure, discipline, and precision that residents thrive on, “uninhabitants” — that is, the majority of the population — are unable to do so, notes Segar.

“Uninhabited people experience a lot of unexpected things in their lives. They are often the parents who are responsible for the household logistics – if the dog throws up, they clean it up, they organize social events, they pick up and drop off the kids, etc. She could also be someone who manages many people in a workplace.” , says Segar. The bottom line is that the lives of uninhabited people often have many unforeseen events, and when it comes to maintaining healthy habits like mindful eating or regular exercise, uninhabited people’s plans often get messed up, adds the sustainable behavior expert .

In her book The joy choice, Segar notes that this point of conflict becomes your favorite spot—”the true place of power.” What you do here not only determines the fate of your specific behavior change plan, but also your success in supporting the larger goals you set out to achieve, she writes.

The joy choice

So what should you do when so many moving parts in your life—both expected and unexpected—are competing for your time, energy, and attention?

It’s about learning how to navigate and negotiate when behavior change plans are no longer viable, says Segar. Choosing the “perfect imperfect” option – what Segar called “The Joy Choice”. It’s the option to do something instead of nothing and break away from the all-or-nothing mindset so you can maintain momentum and stay on the path of lasting change, she explains.

Basically, “it’s about not letting perfection be the enemy of good enough,” she notes. It’s about having flexible beliefs and strategies that work for you rather than against you, and she elaborates on all the meaningful things that make up your life in her book.

“Flexible thinking cultivates psychological resilience to negative life events, including better coping and emotion regulation in work, relationships, and play,” says Segar. It also encourages creativity in the face of challenges and unexpected sudden changes, she notes in her book.

“We’ve been told over and over for decades to stick to the plan no matter what. This idea is so ingrained in our psyche that those inflexible plans are inevitably blown up and we only have to pick up the pieces once again, despondent and pessimistic about ever being successful,” notes Segar in The joy choice.

But flexible thinking is your “true superpower when it comes to making decisions successfully and making consistent decisions,” she writes. “This is especially true for caregivers and others who live with many competing responsibilities,” adds the health coach.

How can the uninhabited master sustainable change

Starting small is important. “Small is smart because it’s a way to embrace your new change. Whether it’s kids, adults, or pets, learning is easier when you start with a smaller action or thing and build on that as you master that level,” says Segar.

Also, don’t try to make too many changes at once as this would leave you less committed and therefore less successful. Select one behavior change at a time.

It is also imperative to have a flexible and resilient mindset. “Starting out with a plan might take some motivation, but what unfamiliar ones want to make very clear when lasting change is their ultimate goal is that their lifestyle change plan (exercise, meditation for healthy eating, etc.) bend and has to ebb away like your everyday life,” says Segar.

For example, if your goal is to meditate for 20 minutes a day, but you can only schedule 5 minutes on certain days, do it for 5 minutes rather than skipping it entirely just because it was less than your desired time. Or let’s say you decide to go for a jog every morning, but something comes up and you can’t. On those occasions, you can try getting in some cardio by climbing stairs instead of using an elevator or taking a brisk walk around the block between work.

Fuel motivation by believing that something is better than nothing, says Segar. “Try to be flexible and do less instead of trying to stick to plan as a path to lasting success,” she suggests.

Also, no matter what your plan or long-term goal, don’t beat yourself up if you make a mistake or suffer a setback. You are in the works. So, instead of abandoning your plans, allow yourself the gift of grace on these days.